Being Close to Someone with Cancer

When someone close to us has cancer, one of our foremost concerns is how best to help and support them.

At first, we may be unsure what to say or do. Being open and sensitive to how they feel is what most people need. Knowing that you are there for them will be truly helpful.

Relatives who take responsibility for and care for loved ones with cancer also go through difficult times alongside the patients. During this process, which causes both physical and psychological fatigue, our suggestions for relatives caring for patients may help them feel better and be more effective.

Below, we have prepared 6 suggestions for relatives caring for people with cancer: 

Set 3 Goals You Can Achieve

When you feel well yourself, you can help others feel well. Therefore, by looking after yourself, you can care more effectively for the patient you are responsible for. Start with a few small goals. For example, you could make time for yourself to go for a walk. You can begin with a 15-minute walk at a suitable time you choose each day. As you achieve your small goals, your motivation will increase, and both you and your patient will feel better.

Do Not Hesitate to Ask for Help

It is normal to feel reluctant to ask for help. However, being unable to keep up with everything, or lacking the strength for some things, does not mean that you are inadequate or a failure. When you need support, do not hesitate to ask suitable people and organizations.

While you still have time, you can respect your own limits and request help in any area you need.

Pay Attention to Priorities in Your Tasks

Caring for a patient requires fulfilling significant responsibilities. These include, for example, checking medication schedules, preparing meals, handling hospital paperwork, arranging appointments, monitoring symptoms and more.

To avoid becoming confused amid all these tasks, we recommend being more organized and paying particular attention to those that take priority. It is impossible to do everything at once. However, once you create your list of priorities, you can handle these tasks more easily.

Accept That You Cannot Always Be in Control

Our brains can mislead us about our sense of control. For example: if I look after my sick loved one perfectly, they will recover. Statements like this are often heard from patients’ relatives. Or, when treatment has an unfavorable outcome, the caregiver may blame themselves, as though it happened because they did not provide good enough care. Unfortunately, however, this situation is not entirely within the caregiver’s control, and it is impossible to predict the future. It is helpful to do the best you can and then let things take their course.

Google Cannot Take Responsibility

When you ask the search engine Google, which is not a doctor, about your loved one’s condition, it generally gives you little other than worry and anxiety. Millions of sources appear, and it is not really possible to distinguish which information is accurate and appropriate for your patient.

Moreover, do not exhaust yourself over these results, which can never be personalized. Ask your doctor and do not hesitate to seek a second opinion .

Talk

As a caregiver, it is difficult to remain in good spirits all the time, and you cannot be expected to have no problems. Communicate with your family members or friends. Do not isolate yourself. When something troubles you, share it with your family. Staying silent may make you feel angry and resentful later. The responsibility you have taken on is not easy, and always carrying it out lovingly can be challenging. When you feel you are struggling, give yourself a short break.